By Briana Bass, Christian Romance Author, Devotional Writer & Certified Professional Coach

I’m blessed to be surrounded by wonderful friends. Friends from high school and college that I still keep in touch with. Friends from my old job. Friends from my travels. I’m so lucky to have each and every one of them in my life.

I can vent to them and they can vent to me. We celebrate birthdays, weddings, and new careers together. We mourn together. Simply knowing they are in my corner gives me peace of mind.

Friends and family are the two biggest influences in our lives. While we can’t always choose our family, we do have discretion when selecting friends. Who we allow into our lives matters.

Thank You for Being a Friend

Surround yourself with people who encourage you to try new things, but who also support you and won’t push you into something you don’t feel comfortable doing. Friends should help each other grow. As humans we are constantly changing and evolving. Each new season of life provides opportunities to become new versions of ourselves. Our friends are essential to helping us grow into ourselves!

Proverbs 27:17 says, “Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend” (KJV). We need friends to challenge us. But they have to be the right friends. True friends won’t pressure you into decisions that don’t align with your values. True friends will make time for you. True friends will offer valid advice.

It’s okay if your friends aren’t available at the drop of a hat. They have lives, too! But they shouldn’t outright ignore your texts or calls. They should genuinely be remorseful if they have scheduling conflicts and are unable to hang out. They should put as much effort into the relationship as you do. As with any other type of relationship, friendships should be equal partnerships.

That’s What Friends Are For

An equal partnership means that you also bear a responsibility toward your friends. In Mark 2:1-5, a man with paralysis is healed by Jesus, not because the man believes in Jesus but because the man’s friends believe! It is their faith that Jesus recognizes and their faith that leads to a miracle.

How we care for our friends is as important as how they care for us. Friendships are a two-way street. You have to put in the effort, not just your friend! This goes beyond replying to a phone call or even praying for them. You need to make sure that you are providing sound advice when your friend needs it. You have to be willing to compromise and not be selfish, doing only activities you want to do. You must allow your friend space to grow and space to say no if they don’t feel comfortable with something you want them to do.

It’s come down to respect. Respect is an aspect of love. If you love your friends, you want the best for them. You want Jesus to notice your faith and love for your friends, even if, and especially when, your friends may not have enough faith and love in themselves.

I’ll be There for You

Human beings crave community. We are not created to go through life alone. That being said, you want to make sure you are running with the right crowd. You deserve good friends. You deserve to be surrounded by people who love you and build you up.

When you find your crowd, don’t let them go. Good friends can sometimes be hard to find but they are truly a blessing from God.