By Briana Bass, Christian Romance Author, Devotional Writer & Certified Professional Coach

I’m a big fan of women mentoring women. There’s so much younger women can learn from women with more life experience. As Christians, mentorship is a key component to our faith journeys. Titus 2 calls older men to mentor younger men and older women to mentor younger women. This is wonderful. We should share our wisdom from one generation to the next.

What bothers me is that while we are quick to encourage young women to find mentors, we are slow to encourage them to give as much as they receive. The focus is on what they can get out of the relationship. Once the mentorship runs its course, the older woman is often forgotten.

Both older women and older men eventually become sidelined by society. Many live alone. Some live in assisted living facilities or nursing homes, abandoned by their families. Human connection becomes limited to doctors, nurses, and aides. Thankfully, this is a tragedy we can easily reverse.

Women Supporting Women

There’s something to be said for life experience. It’s why mentorship matters. Other women, particularly those who are older than us, help us navigate our journeys by sharing about their trials and triumphs. As Job says, “With the ancient is wisdom; and in length of days understanding” (Job 12:12 KJV). These ladies know what they’re talking about. Regardless of generational differences, there are universal constants every woman will face: romantic relationships, friendships, family dynamics, questions about money, questions about faith. The list goes on and on.

Our mentors graciously give of themselves because they love us and want us to thrive. One day, we will become the mentors and pass on our knowledge to the next generation. Doesn’t that sound exciting? The women mentoring you today were once in your shoes, thrilled to lead by example and encourage others. Now, according to our cultural zeitgeist, they’ve fulfilled their responsibility to younger women and outlived their usefulness.

That’ll be us one day, too, if we don’t make changes today. We will be the ones forgotten by our children and grandchildren. Hurts to think about. Yet, that’s exactly what’s already happened to the older women in our society. They pour into other people only to be rejected once they’ve emptied themselves. This is not okay. After everything they’ve done for us, how dare we turn our backs on them?

From Generation to Generation

Intergenerational community has largely been lost in modern Western society. The influence of grandparents, aunts, and uncles has diminished. We focus on the nuclear family of parents and children, with extended family considered a burden we must deal with at holidays and weddings. This is not to judge those who terminated relationships with toxic family members; there are situations where distancing oneself from relatives is valid.

But not every maiden aunt or bachelor uncle or widowed grandmother deserves to be ignored by their family. Their role may change, or be limited due to cognitive and physical declines, but we can still love them and learn from them. Consider the older women you’ve known throughout your life. What did they teach you? Perhaps how to knit or sew, how to budget your money, how to be a good steward of the earth and its resources, or how to change the oil in your car. How do you repay them for this education? How do you repay not only the time and knowledge, but the love and patience?

By being there for them now. Many of them have likely experienced major life changes including the loss of a spouse or significant health conditions. They need companionship. They need help around the house. They need advocates. Let’s put aside what we can get from them and instead consider what we can give to them.

Establishing Connections

Our elderly friends and relatives have given us so much. It’s time we gave back to them. My invitation to you is to reach out to the older women in your life. If you have a living grandmother, give her a call. Email an aunt. Adopt a grandparent at your local nursing home. Share lunch with a widow from your church. In so many instances, all they want is someone to talk to.

Loving our neighbors includes loving our elders. Don’t forget about them. Keep them in your heart and in your mind and in your life. Show them that they matter. Remember that they, too, are children of God.